-ending is a let down/anticlimatic (no follow-through)
Not every animation has to end in the conventional way, bitch. Are you afraid to try something different?
I just pitched our film as it stands to my mom, and she really enjoyed it - she understands it. She loves the whole idea but thinks we should do away with the wishy-washy things like the bird and kick off the animation right in the middle of the battle.
A possibility for our ending: What if, at the climax, when our enraged ape is about to kill the enemy soldier, in protest the soldier takes off his mask and says something to this effect, "You weren't always this way! You're not meant to fight their war..." so on and so on. This could spark something, perhaps it was a gesture, or perhaps its the sheer display of humanity in the man that triggers our apes final overpower of his enslaving device. (After all the ape can't understand English). My mom suggested that there be a point where the 2 of them truly connect and hence the climax- is the gorilla going to kill him?? Yes? No? Yes?
Anyway, I just wanted to throw this idea out there. I think our ending is okay, but it would be good if we could add something to it to make it more SATISFYING perhaps. Keep all the elements.
2 comments:
Hmmm...I agree that the ending shot is cool, and I have no problem with the beginning and middle parts as pitched...I think there's some really solid stuff there. I think most of our problems lie at the climax. In order to pull him away from the soldier and the influence of the implants, we need something really, really strong. Like the implants are forcing him to kill someone/destroy something that's really important to him. What would be important to this gorilla, though? A human that was kind to him/he'd met before? Other gorillas? I think if we could establish a strong attachment to something and have his desire to protect it be in direct conflict with the mandate of the implants, the problem would be solved. Thoughts?
As for the bird, I like both beginnings. I like the thought of being in the thick of things at the start of the story, but I also like the bird seen out of the chopper window (maybe we could start in the thick of battle and have the bird catch his attention later on overhead, even while he's recovering from the explosion and lying on his back or something).
I agree with your mom that the ending is cool
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